Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
Music
Flew too high and burnt the wing
I do not feel good today. I slept most of the day.
That I would like you to know that if you’re ever single
I have been struggling for about 2 years and trying to end this relationship and now that it’s done, I feel extremely lost. A lot of my friends have contacted me and assured me that I was doing the right thing. I have been filled with rage and fear. When I went to the doctor, she said my blood preasure was high and she could tell that I was nervous. She refilled my emergency medicine, which I have been afraid to ask to have refilled because last time they wanted me to pee in a cup. I panicked and they didn’t.
Her best friend has been talking to me and I feel like she is on my side. She reassures me that my actions are inline with any stable person’s reaction.
This song – just gets to me sometimes..
God forbid you ever had to walk a mile in her shoes
Late at night she knocks on my door
And I had a feeling that I belonged
Tomorrow, I take Dutchess in to get surgery on her fatty lumps and skin tags because they could be cancerous. This is all too much for me. Some dirty chick is nextdoor with the kids I love or out getting drunk with someone I thought cared about me a little more than she does. I want to go for a run but I am sad to say that I would rather not go out alone without anyone to tell where I am.. and well, right now, that’s where I am. I have no one to tell where I will be for the first time in a few years. I have been yearning for it and even begging for it and here I am – finding myself lonely. I told myself that I would do all these productive things if I had time to myself again, but instead I obsess over what she is doing and with whom.
There are addictions to feed and there are mouths to pay
I always have to remember that I should be able to handle what I ask for. I have been trying to find a way out of this relationship for a while now, but when she moves on before I realize that we are actually broken up – it hurts. Not to mention, it didn’t help that it’s the mechanic that she met since we have been together. She has been obsessed with her ever since and even kicked my brother out of our house when he was talking shit about her.
I let her come in my house, smoked with her and she took my believed to be girlfriend out on New Years Eve. For some reason, I didn’t expect to be so offended and defensive, but I guess that is what my life has become. My old friends will be glad to have me back, but it will be hard gathering them all up. One of the last women that I dated – years ago – has already had a baby, left her boyfriend and gotten back with him – not that I am keeping tabs. Then well, my favorite friend still can’t or won’t talk to me anymore – so that’s always fun and difficult. The only reason that I ever thought it would be a good idea to be in a relationship in the first place, is I thought it would help guys trust me with their girlfriends but apparently, I’ve gone and fucked that one up.
It’s a small crime
This has always been one of my favorite song but the video kind of creeps me out.
My brother came home from drinking. He is still talking about this girl that really messed him up down in Port A.
He kind of reminds me of someone I know. I have heard, “What did I do wrong?” way too many times.
