Nothing Compares 2 U

So it’s not hard to fall when you float like a cannon

• by She Says • In Grammy Nominee •   Comments Off on So it’s not hard to fall when you float like a cannon

My heart is racing and I don’t even know what to do with myself. There are two sides of my emotions and both of them are beaming but by the way I am just trying to stay calm really shows me how far I have come. It’s an energy that makes me want to run around in circles. Though the realist in me stops any celebrations until I knoiw that she is free.

After a long walk in the woods, I couldn’t be smiling more and I hardly even questioned if I failed once again because she has a way of telling me that I haven’t – though, there is a deep level of regret that I didn’t trust how I felt and wrote it off so many times before.

I don’t feel comfortable writing any meaningful words on here so I will add a handful of songs and then I’ll go and find some secure way to write down cherished memories.

In February 2022, days before the Russian and Ukrain war broke out, I hear Chris Cornell’s version of Nothing Compares to You. At the time I saw it called a Prince cover. Before that day, I did not realize that Sinéad O’Connor’s version was a cover. Now that all of the above have passed, I am going to see how Pink sounds covering it. Clearly all the lines are not applicable but I sure do enjoy a few of them. I cut and paste my pop songs the way that I like the best.

Driving away was so very hard today. I trust in the future completely and I get less afraid personally every day – globally, I can not say the same.

A touching performance after he just was told live in his concert.

I just shouldn’t think anymore tonight ’cause

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Today makes 2 years from when – when.. when my world changed and I stopped trusting men completely. A former roommate’s trial is already over. He is spending 60 years in prison but it doesn’t make it any better and it doesn’t help my deep level of fear of people that I thought I once trusted.

It’s still hard to talk about. I see her sons often. One is still in high school, the other is in college and her daughter that saw it all happen and called the police is off in some other state with a father she barely knows – life is fucking hard and when I can’t calm down and I am ready to do whatever it takes there is a deep seeded reason that I can’t even fully talk about 2 years later.

I also ask myself why I looked at that bullet hole in the fence – that story is a really rough one for me.

Something happened last Sunday after I tried to go to this place again. It was quite devastating and it made last week the longest ever. Now I am panicked and afraid on a level that I can not even talk about because I can’t verbalize it nearly for superstitious reasons but I just can’t let certain works leave my being. I am so scared and questioning what the right things is – I am well aware of my limitations but that just keep me at a distance for her.

I’ve been walking these streets at night

• by She Says • In Rock •   Comments Off on I’ve been walking these streets at night

When I heard this version of ‘Nothing Compares 2 U” on sxm the other day, I was more than surprised.

I sit here on the stairs
I’d rather be alone
If I can’t have you right now, I’ll wait, dear

Sometimes it gets so tense
I can’t speed up the time
But you know, love, there’s one more thing to consider

I saw Soundgarden with Nine Inch Nails months before Chris Cornell passed. Based on the circumstance I am willing to bet I wrote about that show on here in September of 2014.

So keep your head up, keep your love

• by admin • In Folk Rock, Folk Rock, Indie Folk, Indie Rock, Music, Rock •   Comments Off on So keep your head up, keep your love

I had just had a used transmission put into my Mazda 5 because my driver’s side drive axle went out. I had to have both front axles replace. That was about 100 miles ago. Less than 20 miles ago, I had one of my struts replaced that I skipped before due to a budget. I am disappointed in The Silver Bullet and miss The Deathsled. I was turning a corner after a stop sign. I was going up hill and took the turn sharper than normal. I really have no idea what happened because it seemed like I hit something big out of no where – and once I got out, I pretty much confirmed that theory. There was a rock retaining wall and it seems that one of the large rocks was somewhat in the road. I should not have turned so sharply but I did not expect that to stop me in my tracks. If you must know – I hit a lot of curbs.

During a recent conversation with my father, I came to realize that I do much better with rear wheel drive cars. For the longest time, I drove a Dodge Stealth and I loved the shit out of that car, until I could no longer keep up with it’s maintenance – not that I ever could but around 2014 or so, my 1991 sports car started to deteriorate fast.

In 2017, when I moved and was in a terrible place, I sold it for $500 – a decision I have regretted since. Today, my sister’s boyfriend sent me this picture of a car he saw that looked just like it – and little did he know, I am quite sure that it is my car. I can tell by the way the clear coat is peeling and I was the one that put those rims on the car. They are police interceptor steal rims. It excites me to just see the pictures and almost makes me want to cry. I have been the most sensitive lately and feeling ever so lonely – but I remind myself that I am much stronger that many people that are much more lonely through out this pandemic and nearly feel guilty for even being sad. I have been battling my ego and thoughts for a few weeks now.

Now on to the originally planned programming.