Oh my life is changing everyday

February 14, 2019June 22, 2019 • by admin • In Country, Grammy Nominee, Music, Pop, Pop Rock, Rap Rock, Rock, Soft Rock • 0

Since it was Valentine’s day, I spent time with the woman that I love most – my grandma. On the way to her house, I heard a song on the radio that caught my attention. It was about half way through the song when I realized that it must be called “In The Air Tonight” by Phil Collins, because I recognized a line that took me back to “Stan” by Eminiem. It’s funny that I have watched the movie “Kids” and related this song to Eminiem.. it’s just unexpected to learn anything from Marshall Mathers.

I really have no idea what that song is about but the first few lines spoke to me, then I realized it was the song that was referenced in “Stan” and I have always loved that song. I used to watch the “Guilty Conscience” video way too often too.

Today, when I was talking about going to see a friend after I left her house – she said, “That’s something you have a lot of – friends, that’s really good.” She married when she was 16 years old. She feels like she missed out on a lot in life – and I know that having her own personal friends is one of them. She is a twin so if it wasn’t her sister, it was her husband. She has no idea how much my friends help me get through. There are moments when I feel like no one cares and no one understands and that everything is pointless – and just at the right moment, someone steps back in my life and reminds me that I am worth it.. and that everything is just circumstantial. It makes a big difference. Never underestimate how much a few words might help someone on such a deep level.

When this video came out, I thought that it was so great. My life has changed a little, however, it is still entertaining.

The next song that I paid attention to while driving to my grandma’s house was The Cranberries.

Then I came home and my brother was singing a personal favorite of ours.

Cause it’s a bittersweet symphony this life.

February 13, 2019June 22, 2019 • by admin • In Alternative rock, Grammy Nominee, Music • 0

Every day of the thirteen days that I have been at home after getting laid off have really worn on me. The other extenuating circumstances have not helped any. What has helped is hearing from people that truly care. I wish that I didn’t need a reminder, but it makes a big difference. I have never been one to seek attention, but it seems that I appreciate it a lot more than I realize.

After not receiving my unemployment card and feeling like I have waited forever for my severance check, I decided to check on it. The HR lady assured me that I would get paid this Friday with everyone else’s pay check so that helps me not have to worry about when I will see my next dollar. It has been a hard lesson to learn that I accidentally get comfortable and I often take things for granted without meaning to. I thought that I was reminded of this when I went to Guatemala and couldn’t drink the water.

God forbid you ever had to walk a mile in her shoes

January 8, 2019June 22, 2019 • by admin • In Blues, Grammy Nominee, Rock • Comments Off

And I’m sorry that I couldn’t get to you

November 19, 2018June 22, 2019 • by admin • In Grammy Nominee, Music, Pop • Comments Off

I hate when this song is playing deep down inside. Tomorrow, I am having some dumb procedure and I am a bit nervous about it. People say it is nothing, but at this point, I am worried about what they could or could not find.

When I drive by her old house, there are tons of construction equipment parked in front. There’s something quite depressing about that.

I nearly cry every time I listen to this song. Since it came our in 2014 – it has always had the same effect on me, but right now it feels realer than it ever has before.

Then of course, YouTube brought these feelings back too. It knows what songs hurt best together.

When I say you sucked my brain out

November 10, 2018June 22, 2019 • by admin • In Alternative rock, Folk Rock, Grammy Nominee, Indie Folk, Music • 0

In 2015, I saw Ani DIfranco at Emo’s. I have been listening to her since high school tore me apart. She has saved me time and time again.

The first song I had ever heard was “My IQ” and the second was “Untouchable Face”

Who am I?
Somebody, somebody just tell me that much

And these foolish games are tearing me apart

October 23, 2018June 23, 2019 • by admin • In Folk, Grammy Nominee, Pop, Pop Rock • Comments Off

For whatever reason, I hear this song nearly daily and think about her every time. I think back to the conversation when she told me that she may regret some decisions that she had made. I always read too far into anything that she said. I wanted to think that she regretted choosing C over me when faced when the situation so long ago – though I am sure that she didn’t think that I was a possibility.. seeing that she lived with him and I had no idea.. It’s weird to think about a lot of things like that.

My brother met her once, she came over and we hung out in my room. He had already had preconceived notions about her and it all changed when he met her. He would say things like, “She is just not into you… you’re just going to have to find a way to get over her.” and from time to time, before he knew her at all, just thought she was a stuck up bitch taking advantage of the fact that I was completely head over heels for her.. typical reaction from a brother, but when he met her… he said he really liked her ans she could see why I was always.. caught up in her. I guess he just saw our connection, which is not normal for a brother that could careless about what I do in that manner.

I always wondered what it would have been like to be able to meet her father. What would it have been like in an alternate universe?